10 Things to Know About Bringing a Guy to a Wedding
Number8 will surprise you
- Unless you specifically state otherwise, he's going to consider this a date. Wedding dates (as in, a date you take to a wedding, although the calendar date the wedding takes place on is important too) are serious business. If you're asking him to be a plus-one to bear witness to one of the most romantic things two individuals could do, he's going to assume there's some kind of romantic interest there. Avoid anyone you think is even remotely attracted to you. Maybe he'll suddenly think you're one of those "will they or won't they" relationships or something. And keep in mind that if he suddenly realizes halfway through the cocktail hour you're not interested, he might eventually peel off to hit on the bridesmaids. Make sure that you're very clear it's not a date, unless you want it to be a date. In which case, totally make sure he knows it's a date.
- Getting a plus-one for a wedding is like getting a dog: You better make sure you can handle the responsibility. So your friends have trusted you enough that they've given you permission to introduce a wildcard to their special day. "Plus one" is technically carte blanche to bring anyone. But that doesn't mean you should bring someone just for the sake of having a date. You need to nurture and care for your wedding date. Don't just leave him at the bar alone to drink while you go dance with your friends.
- Don't invite someone you barely know. At the same time, don't invite someone you've gone on one date with just for the hell of it. You shouldn't drag a new Tinder match along just because you want to one-up your ex who will also be in attendance. The person you bring obviously won't be special to the bride or groom, but they should be special to you. If you wouldn't ask this person along to a funeral to provide comfort and support, don't bring them to a wedding.
- If you are interested at some other dude at the wedding, go by yourself. For one thing, it's kind of shitty to plan on ditching your plus-one when he likely doesn't know anyone at the wedding. For another, that guy you're chasing might not think you're available. I don't care who you bring, it'll send him the wrong vibes.
- Don't expect him to go halfsies on shit. He's allowed to offer to pay for a gift or hotel accommodations, but don't expect him to. He's already doing you a favor of coming with you to a wedding where he knows no one. Don't stiff him with the bill.
- Establish that he is OK with dancing a lot. Otherwise, you probably won't dance a lot. Again, you could just leave to go dance, but then you're leaving him alone. You should really be treating him like a baby. Don't walk away unless you know that someone else is talking to him.
- Don't even bother asking for a plus-one if you're in the bridal party. Or, at least, think very carefully. Will you actually have any time to spend with him? Traditionally, you're going to be so busy taking pictures, etc., that having a date doesn't even matter.
-DO NOT EVEN TRY TO CATCH THE BOUQUET. It's fine to go up there and fake it. It's also possible the bride has already arranged for someone else to catch it because they're next to be engaged. But don't even bother doing it. Even if it isn't awkward between you and your date, people will come up and make jokes about you two marrying. Those will be awkward, especially when you have to deflect them by explaining you've only gone on a handful of dates or he's just a friend.
- Make sure he owns a suit. Unless the wedding is casual and you're cool with him showing up in his Tapout tee.
-You owe him one. Unless this guy loves going to weddings, he did you the favor. One day, he will call on you, and you must be there. Likely at his cousin's wedding in August or something.
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Number8 will surprise you
- Unless you specifically state otherwise, he's going to consider this a date. Wedding dates (as in, a date you take to a wedding, although the calendar date the wedding takes place on is important too) are serious business. If you're asking him to be a plus-one to bear witness to one of the most romantic things two individuals could do, he's going to assume there's some kind of romantic interest there. Avoid anyone you think is even remotely attracted to you. Maybe he'll suddenly think you're one of those "will they or won't they" relationships or something. And keep in mind that if he suddenly realizes halfway through the cocktail hour you're not interested, he might eventually peel off to hit on the bridesmaids. Make sure that you're very clear it's not a date, unless you want it to be a date. In which case, totally make sure he knows it's a date.
- Getting a plus-one for a wedding is like getting a dog: You better make sure you can handle the responsibility. So your friends have trusted you enough that they've given you permission to introduce a wildcard to their special day. "Plus one" is technically carte blanche to bring anyone. But that doesn't mean you should bring someone just for the sake of having a date. You need to nurture and care for your wedding date. Don't just leave him at the bar alone to drink while you go dance with your friends.
- Don't invite someone you barely know. At the same time, don't invite someone you've gone on one date with just for the hell of it. You shouldn't drag a new Tinder match along just because you want to one-up your ex who will also be in attendance. The person you bring obviously won't be special to the bride or groom, but they should be special to you. If you wouldn't ask this person along to a funeral to provide comfort and support, don't bring them to a wedding.
- If you are interested at some other dude at the wedding, go by yourself. For one thing, it's kind of shitty to plan on ditching your plus-one when he likely doesn't know anyone at the wedding. For another, that guy you're chasing might not think you're available. I don't care who you bring, it'll send him the wrong vibes.
- Don't expect him to go halfsies on shit. He's allowed to offer to pay for a gift or hotel accommodations, but don't expect him to. He's already doing you a favor of coming with you to a wedding where he knows no one. Don't stiff him with the bill.
- Establish that he is OK with dancing a lot. Otherwise, you probably won't dance a lot. Again, you could just leave to go dance, but then you're leaving him alone. You should really be treating him like a baby. Don't walk away unless you know that someone else is talking to him.
- Don't even bother asking for a plus-one if you're in the bridal party. Or, at least, think very carefully. Will you actually have any time to spend with him? Traditionally, you're going to be so busy taking pictures, etc., that having a date doesn't even matter.
-DO NOT EVEN TRY TO CATCH THE BOUQUET. It's fine to go up there and fake it. It's also possible the bride has already arranged for someone else to catch it because they're next to be engaged. But don't even bother doing it. Even if it isn't awkward between you and your date, people will come up and make jokes about you two marrying. Those will be awkward, especially when you have to deflect them by explaining you've only gone on a handful of dates or he's just a friend.
- Make sure he owns a suit. Unless the wedding is casual and you're cool with him showing up in his Tapout tee.
-You owe him one. Unless this guy loves going to weddings, he did you the favor. One day, he will call on you, and you must be there. Likely at his cousin's wedding in August or something.
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