Sunday, 31 July 2016

An Hour of Exercise Can Cancel Out the Health Risks!



Sitting for eight hours a day doesn’t seem to raise your risk for dying early, according to a new analysis of previous studies—but only if you get at least an hour of exercise daily.
The results, published this week in the Lancet, may be reassuring for people stuck behind a desk all day, say health experts, but it should also serve as an important reminder: If you have to sit for long periods, your daily workout is vital to your well-being.
The connection between sitting and dying has been studied extensively, and has inspired many scary headlines in the media. And while this research didn’t actually look at any new data, it did combine information from 16 previous studies in a way than hadn’t been done before.
Using this data, researchers were able to directly compare death rates over a certain period of time between people with different levels of sitting time and physical activity. “Examining the joint effects of these two behaviors is important,” they wrote, “because most people engage in both behaviors every day.”

After crunching the numbers, the international team of researchers found that a sedentary lifestyle was indeed associated with an increased risk of death over the next decade. But the more people were active when they weren’t sitting, the more their risk went down. And for people who got the most daily exercise—at least 60 to 75 minutes of moderate physical activity—the increased risk disappeared completely.
In fact, those who sat for at least eight hours a day but were also in the highest exercise group actually had a lower risk of dying than those who sat for four hours or less but who reported the lowest amount of daily exercise (about five minutes a day).
The researchers also looked specifically at studies on television watching, rather than just sitting. Once again, they found that too much sedentary time—in these cases, at least five hours a day of TV viewing—was linked to early death.
But they also found one significant difference: In these studies, getting lots of exercise only seemed to lessen the risk of dying—not eliminate it completely. (The researchers don’t know why, but they speculate that TV watching may also involve snacking as well as sitting, making its harmful effects harder to counteract with exercise alone.)

Co-author Ulf Ekelund, PhD, professor of sports medicine at the Norwegian School of Sports Sciences in Norway, says that an hour a day of moderate physical activity is a good goal for many people. He points out, however, that exercise recommendations shouldn’t be the same across the board.
“I can’t stress enough that lower amounts of activity are also beneficial,” he says. And for people who are already getting an hour of exercise a day, they shouldn’t necessarily stop there—or use it as an excuse to be sedentary the rest of the time.
“The results suggest that the less you sit (or watch TV) and the more you are active the better,” he says. “The take-home message is ‘Sit less, move more—and the more the better.’” 
That doesn't necessarily mean you have to live at the gym, adds Pam Peeke, MD, a national spokesperson for the American College of Sports Medicine and author of Fit to Live. Yourphysical activity can spread out throughout the day. "Get up for 5 to 10 minutes per hour when you're stuck at a desk," she suggests. "Go up and down stairs. Walk and talk on the phone using a headset." And when you can, schedule more deliberate exercise time, like a yoga class or a morning run with a friend. "It all countsand will save your life."

6 Ways to Be the Best Sex He's Ever Had



When it comes to knowing what makes your partner tick in the bedroom, tutorials on "mind-blowing sex positions" only get you so far. To discuss a few practical ways couples can actually have more stimulating and gratifying sex, we sought out Dr. Bea Jaffrey, a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist based in Switzerland. Below are some tips from her new book on how to overcome common sex issues, 159 Mistakes Couples Make in the Bedroom.

Tell Him What Turns You On

Research suggests that better communication is key to better sex, and no, we don't necessarily mean dirty talk. Communicating what you like and don't like can be instructional and informative as you get to know each other's bodies. If he's doing something you like, say so rather than relying on ambiguous gestures or noises. And if it's something you're not into, communicate that or guide him in a new direction. Want to try a different angle? Suggest one. If simultaneous orgasm is your goal and you're close to climaxing, don't be mum about it.

Don't Underestimate the Power of Praise

In a 2016 study published in the Journal of Sex Research, researchers analyzed answers from 39,000 heterosexual couples that were married or cohabiting for over three years. Sexual satisfaction reported to be higher among the couples who revealed that they gave each other positive affirmation during sex and were open enough about embarrassing moments during sex to joke about them and move on. Dr. Jaffrey notes that this lighthearted approach to sex is key, saying, "Don't take life too seriously. Happy couples laugh together."

Keep Things Spontaneous

Even great sex can start to feel monotonous over time if it's more or less the same old routine. To mix things up, Marie Claire's guy expert Lodro Rinzler suggests that "if you're in bed with someone and have a sense of something new you or your partner might enjoy, be it some teasing, a change in position, anything…go for it. Men love it when women are spontaneous and confident in their ability in bed."
Dr. Jaffrey also recommends switching up the time and place to avoid falling into a rut of once-a-week "duty sex." "Try new places to have sex, maybe on the sofa, in the car or on the kitchen countertops? Or how about the back row of a movie theater? Be careful though because sex is illegal in public places. Try role-playing...take a bath together. Be inventive, have fun."

Think of Foreplay as a Long-Term Act

Jaffrey notes that setting the mood for sex is vital, for women especially, and that foreplay should start long before sex even begins: "I am talking here about the mental foreplay that happens days in advance, not the one that you have just before sex. Make sure to be attentive to your partner. Small gestures and nice comments are significant to setting the right mood for sex." She also suggests keeping up communication during the day through texts or emails.

Exercise and Don't Skimp on the D (the *Vitamin* D)

If anyone doubted the power of exercise, there's a good chance the Class Pass subscription you passed up this year is affecting your sex drive. "Exercise improves circulation in the body, and that includes the blood flow to your genital area, consequently increasing the desire and lifting your mood". We're sure those endorphins don't hurt.
And as for those of us city dwellers lacking in vitamin D? "Even during the summer, we don't get enough vitamin D because we're scared of the UV rays causing us skin cancer and premature aging," says Dr. Jaffrey. "Though too much sun can be damaging to the skin, Vitamin D is essential for estrogen production in women and testosterone production in men. It boosts your libido so if you feel friskier during the summer, this is the reason." Our pressing spring feverquestions answered? We think yes.

Go for Morning Sex or Afternoon Delight

Dr. Jaffrey notes in her new book that a major reason for mismatched desire between couples is the way men and women handle stress during the week. Men, she says, see sex as a stress reliever while women want to have sex after they've had time to unwind. As a result, women tend to go to bed exhausted, their minds focused on preparing for the next day.
Her solution? "A better alternative is to have sex in the morning. Set the alarm 30 minutes before your usual time and see what happens. Men's testosterone levels peak in the morning so you might be pleasantly surprised...Another alternative would be to have afternoon sex on weekends. Interestingly enough, women tend to ovulate in the afternoon, meaning that the optimal hormone level for female sexual desire happens at that time."
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See How this Nigerian man allegedly hacked into bank’s electronic mail in Ghana and stole money




A Nigerian man identified as Godwin Onwuneme Udu was arrested at Haatso, Ghana on July 19, for allegedly hacking into a bank’s electronic mail and stealing  GH¢25,000.

The deputy director in-charge of the Unit, Assistant Superintendent of Police (ASP) Eugene Nyavor, said the management of the bank (name withheld) arrested and handed over Godwin to the police.

Godwin allegedly transferred the cash from the customer and transferred it into his personal account at a different bank. He was nabbed by the police and bank officials on his way to withdraw the money from his bank at Haatso.
It was also revealed that he been operating with other gangsters and have engaged in another fraud case also being handled by the Documentation Fraud Unit at the police headquarter in Accra.
According to ASP Nyavor, the suspect hacked into the bank’s email account and transferred the money from a customer’s account into a different account. The bank noticed the fraud and mounted surveillance, which led to his arrest at the Haatso branch of the bank where he had gone to withdraw some money using a check book. He has provisionally been charged for stealing and is being prepared for court.
ASP Nyavor urged banks to consult expects to monitor their control systems to save them from any financial losses.
“Bankers must also ensure that they get authorization from customers before huge sums of money are given out, even when the bearer has a check book,”  he said.
Source: Daily Guide Ghana News

Jay Z Owned Roc Nation Officially Welcomes Tiwa Savage Into Their Family -See Deal


Roc Nation which is owned by award winning American rapper, Jay Z has officially welcomed Mavin queen, Tiwa Savage into their record label. The songstress is now officially the first Nigerian artiste signed to the reputable international label.
Although not much is known about the deal, it is believed that Tiwa signed a management deal with Roc Nation in conjunction with Mavin records which will see her music and brand promoted in foreign countries including America and others covered by Roc Nation.
An excited Tiwa who is now single and searching, shared the news of the official signing on her Instagram page.




View image on Twitter
View image on Twitter

Although not much is known about the deal, it is believed that Tiwa signed a management deal with Roc Nation in conjunction with Mavin records which will see her music and brand promoted in foreign countries including America and others covered by Roc Nation.
An excited Tiwa who is now single and searching, shared the news of the official signing on her Instagram page.

Daughter arrested after sending fake kidnapping video to mother



A daughter sent a sick hoax kidnapping video to her horrified mother claiming she was tied up in a hotel room after being kidnapped.
Jessica Johnson, 22, filmed herself on a bed bound and gagged in South Carolina, US.
Her mother Christie called police who managed to track her down and find her slumped on the bed and unresponsive.It was now discovered to be a hoax .
The 22-year-old is now being held in custody after being charged with making a false police report. Her bail bond was set at $30,000.

 
her mug shot
watch video here

Anita Joseph flaunts dangerous curves in sexy new photos while Juliet Ibrahim looks beautiful on low cut - see photos

The beautiful actress is really rocking her short hair .
 The actress showed off her famous curves in photos she shared.
See More Photos Below

Stephen Keshi: Nigeria Federal Government VS South African FG; Who did it better? – Must Read



The Nigerian government should take a cue form its South African counterpart on how to accord state funeral for national heroes. Former Nigeria skipper and coach Stephen Keshi was laid to rest in his village of Ilah, southern Nigeria, on Friday afternoon, but without the fanfare promised by the federal government.




Sports minister Solomon Dalung in an attempt to justify the embarrassing act said the government chose a low-key funeral because Keshi left behind a family that has to be catered for. Despite the excuse, no federal government delegate (apart from NFF executives) attended the burial.
Keshi made history in 2013, when he became the second man after Mahmoud El Gohary of Egypt to win the Africa Cup of Nations both as a player and a coach.

Here are pictures showing how South African goalkeeper and captain Senzo Meyiwa who was shot
dead during a burglary, was given a state burial by the government versus how our own national hero was buried.

Friday, 29 July 2016

See these popular Wrong sayings

WRONG PHILOSOPHIES
1. *"WHATEVER WILL BE, WILL BE"*
```Whatever will be will not be; you have to make it be. You have a part to play in what will be in your life, so don't leave it to chance.```
2. *"HALF BREAD IS BETTER THAN NONE!"*
```Why settle for half bread when you can get  a full bread or even own a bakery. This is a limiting belief that positions you to settle for less and it is a mediocre to philosophy.```
3. *"A FOOL AT FORTY IS A FOOL FOREVER"*
```A fool at any age can be a fool forever if he refuses to let go of his foolishness. It is never too late to become wise because the day you wake up and wise up is the day you CHANGE!```
4. *"ALL FINGERS ARE NOT EQUAL"*
```Yes! Physical fingers in your hands are not equal but that does not make any of them valueless. Lose one and you realise that they are all valuable. You are not even a finger, so why look down on yourself.```
5. *"LIFE BEGINS AT FORTY"*
```If you are below forty and believe this, I feel so sorry for you because it means you are not yet alive.``` 
6. *"WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN"*
```Is your age coming down? Is your wisdom and knowledge coming down? Is the price of goods coming down? Think my friend!```
7. *"HE WHO LAUGH LAST, LAUGHS BEST!"*
```Why laugh last when you can laugh always and why laugh best when laughter is not a competition. When we programmed ourselves with these strange philosophies, they limit and restrict us.```
```Change the way you think and talk..
You will change your world.
You have the opportunity to RECREATE YOUR WORLD```

Thursday, 28 July 2016

Late Keshi goes home(photos)

BY SIMON EBEGBULEM
PRESIDENT of the Nigeria Football Federation (NFF),
Amaju Pinnick led former football stars such as Uche
Okechukwu, Peter Rufai and many others to Benin
Thursday, where the ex-Super Eagles stars played a
novelty match in honour of late coach Stephen Keshi,
who was laid at the Samuel Ogbemudia stadium.
Similarly, Rufai described Keshi as a disciplinarian who
will be missed by sport loving fans. It would be recalled
that the late Super Eagles star and coach, died in Benin
on. June 8. The remains of the fallen star will be interred
in Ilah, his home town today.
Before the body of the late Coach was laid at the
Stadium, a requiem Mass was held at the St Paul’s
Catholic Church Benin City. Friends and family members
wept profusely when the body was laid at the stadium.
Some of the players who eulogised the late coach and
player, appealed to management of the country's football
to set aside personal interest for the growth of the game.
Ikpeba who particularly noted that Keshi sacrificed a lot
for the growth of football in Nigeria, lamented that
personal interest was the major factor militating against
the progress of the nation’s football.
"Keshi had done a lot for the progress and the level the
game is in Nigeria today. He made a great impact in
Nigeria football and promoted the sport to its highest
level in the country. The void left by Keshi will be difficult
to fill and I appeal to those managing football in Nigeria
to set aside personal interest for the game to grow,"
Ikpeba stated.
On his part, Uche Okechukwu who said he was still in
shock with the demise of Keshi, said he was not happy
with developments in the game in Nigeria. He called for
concerted effort to be made so as to return the country
to its lost glory in the game.

Governor Adams Oshiomhole was represented by the
member representing Etsako Federal constituency in the
House of Representatives, Mr Philip Shuaibu. Other
former Super Eagles players at the event include Austin
Equavoen, Mutiu Adepoju and Victor Ikpeba.

Indonesia executes four drug convicts on Nusakambangan

Indonesia has executed the first four of 14 drug convicts on
death row.
One Indonesian and three Nigerians were killed by firing squad
shortly after midnight local time (17:00 GMT), reports say.
There has been no confirmation yet from the government.
The remaining 10 are expected to be put to death in the
coming days.
Human rights organisation Amnesty International condemned
the executions as a "deplorable act that violates international
and Indonesian law".
Indonesia has some of the world's toughest drug laws, and
has faced intense criticism internationally for resuming
executions.
Fourteen, mostly foreign, drug convicts were executed last
year to widespread condemnation.
Cases of concern
This, the third round of executions under President Joko
Widodo, took place at Nusakambangan prison island.
Relatives had gathered there earlier in the day to say goodbye
to loved ones, according to the Jakarta Post . It also said 17
ambulances were sent to the island - 14 of them carrying
coffins.
One source told local media the execution took place at 00:45
Friday, having been postponed because of heavy rain and
strong winds.
Those who were executed have been named as Indonesian
Freddy Budiman, and three Nigerians - Seck Osmane,
Humphrey Jefferson Ejike and Michael Titus Igweh.
Those who remain on death row include three other
Indonesians, a Pakistani, an Indian, two other Nigerians and
two Zimbabweans.
Activists have been particularly concerned by the cases of the
Pakistani man, Zulfiqar Ali - who they say was beaten into
confessing to heroin possession - and an Indonesian woman,
Merri Utami - who says she was duped into becoming a drug
mule.

Eunice Olawale's Father Shocked After Daughter's Death


The father of murdered RCCG Evangelist Eunice Olawale, was
notified of his daughter's death today. According to Eunice's
cousin Emmanuel Apata, he hasn't come out of the shock
since the news was broken to him in his home in Ekiti and
would be taken to Lagos for medical treatment tomorrow.
May God give him the fortitude to bear the loss.
A lot of lessons to learn from her death.
1 - Do not trust your neighbours.
2 - Do not preach while people are still asleep and in odd
hours.
3 - Do not risk your life, you might bring pains and sorrows to
your loved ones
4 - God protects those who protect themselves
5 - Do not force people to believe in what you believe
6 - Place your safety above every other things.
7 - Try running away from danger first while calling for help.
8 - Do not beg your attacker to spare your life cos he won't. Kill
him first if you can.

Wednesday, 27 July 2016

4 Things to Say to Someone Sharing Their Sexual Assault Story



In recent years, campus sexual assault has taken center stage in the media.
Unfortunately, survivors being placed in the spotlight often means their pleas to be heard are dismissed, disrespected and disgraced. For each outpouring of support and understanding, there is an equal amount of shaming and even vilifying survivors. And it has to stop.
It’s not just survivors of campus sexual assault, but those who were subject to any kind of sexual violence are at risk of receiving a similar backlash.
Each person who has shared their sexual assault experience probably remembers hearing something hurtful in response. Even if they chose not to share, the harmful attitudes people spout off still affect people—it may even be part of the reason they don’t share in the first place.
It is time to change that. Survivors’ bravery to tell someone about what happened should result in feelings like relief, acceptance and safety.
Whether you are aware or not, you know someone who has experienced sexual violence. If they choose to disclose their experiences with you, you have a duty to be supportive and understanding. Here is what we need to say to survivors who share their stories with us:
I believe you.
One of the biggest uphill battles survivors face is getting other people to believe their experiences. If someone seeks a compassionate confidant or a police officer willing to help them press charges, they need someone who believes them. Whether due to stigmatized beliefs about women or the misguided expectations for how a victim “should” act (or a combination of both) too often people choose not to believe. The fact that 9 out of 10 victims are female means that male victims face a special breed of refusal to accept their assaults.
While Law & Order: Special Victims Unit may portray an entertaining story, the truth is there isn’t a Detective Benson in every precinct who can convince each survivor to press charges, testify and expose themselves to the rigors of court. Nor should there be! The fact that the person hasn’t gone to the police should not affect someone’s willingness to accept their story. No matter what, it is the person’s choice what they do next.
By telling someone you believe them, you are making that uphill battle just the slightest bit more easy to navigate. Having a crew of people—or even just one—who validates your experiences, can carry someone through the toughest of times. This is the place to start. Tell them you believe their story.
It is not your fault.
Vice President Joe Biden delivered a speech last week to the first-ever United States of Women Summit, in which he explained, “Sex without consent is rape. It is, full stop, rape.” This breakdown shows where people muddy the waters with consent, when the reality is actually crystal clear. If there is no consent, a violation has occurred. The victim has absolutely no responsibility in the actions of the person who did the violating. Period.
Because there is a ludicrous, abstract set of standards for what describes the “perfect victim,” these absolute facts can become lost on people. There is a part of me that hopes this is partially because, deep down, we do not want to believe such atrocious acts can happen in the world. But, we all know that dangerous attitudes about women, sexuality, men and the very concept of consent, strongly dictate where people place blame.
Survivors must be surrounded by the message that what happened is truly, absolutely and unequivocally not their fault. Even without the outside world hurling blame at survivors, the human mind can still stir up misguided guilt while it processes what happened. Let the person who is sharing know that you recognize the responsibility for their assault lies solely with the person who committed it.
You are not alone.
According to RAINN, an American is sexually assaulted every two minutes. When we take emotion and individuality out of the equation, the numbers spell out just how pervasive these experiences are. The simple math tells us that survivors are very much not alone. Because of this fact, however, there are organizations, support hotlines, counseling, support groups, online safe spaces and other forms of support that are widespread and active in providing care to people who have been victimized.
Being a good friend is a way of building the person’s support network and reminding them that they are also not alone in the sense of having caring people around them. If you feel they would benefit from knowing about other opportunities for help, share these opportunities with them, too.
You still have, and will always have, worth.
Self-worth comes under attack after enduring sexual violence. Internal and external factors affect someone’s perception of themselves and it is vital to remind survivors that they still have, and will always have, value.
Worth comes in a variety of shapes and sizes, from how we value ourselves in relation to other people, to ourselves, to society, to the planet and beyond. All of these can be left feeling less than intact after trauma. Validating the notion that a survivor’s self-worth hasn’t changed after their ordeal is essential. Let them know that even if they don’t feel as if their worth is significant, you do, and that will never change.
This list is by far not exhaustive. Please share what you believe to be other essential messages survivors should hear from their allies—and be sure to share with them directly if they come to you with their account.

5 Surprising Health Benefits of Hemp

Hemp has always had trouble stepping out of the shadow of its dirty cousin marijuana. While it is closely related to whacky tobaccy, hemp has microscopic amounts of THC — the chemical in marijuana that gets you high — and eating hemp foods won’t jeopardize your next drug test. The health benefits of hemp are so vast that people are beginning to abandon the antiquated stereotypes of the versatile plant.
|Know more at luckynewsinfo
Sharon Palmer, author of The Plant Powered Diet, wasn’t wasting her breath when she said, “I think hemp is the next ‘it’ food — it has been for a while.” The hemp seed is bursting with Omega-6 and Omega-3, essential fatty acids that have heart health and anti inflammatory benefits. Hemp seeds are nutty in flavor and breathe life into salads, desserts, yogurts, cereals, and breads. Hemp seeds can be turned into butter, milk, protein powder, finishing oil, and soap.
DO YOU KNOW LEXHANSPLACE?
Unfortunately, Uncle Sam outlawed hemp farming in 1958, a shame when you consider how amazing a crop it is. The plant thrives without pesticides, purifies the soil around it, and kills weeds. The U.S. is the only country that bans industrial hemp farming, quelling what could be an agricultural and financial boon for our indebted country.
Adding hemp foods to your diet is something you should seriously consider, and below are five health benefits of hemp you might not have known.
DO YOU KNOW stingerxpress?
Five Hemp Health Benefits You Didn’t Know About
he protein and fiber in hemp combine to slow digestion, which prevents spikes in blood sugar and therefore sustains your body’s energy. A diet rich in hemp promotes digestive regularity.
When sprinkled on your cereal or fruit at breakfast, hemp protein and fiber also help aid in satiety, which will prevent you from snacking and keep you fuller longer.
The Omega-3 fatty acids in hemp reduces the risk of cardiovascular disease, lower blood pressure, and may even ward off Alzheimer’s disease. Hemp seeds are one of the few Omega-3 sources found in plants.
The Omega-6 fatty acids in hemp stimulate skin and hair growth, maintain bone health, regulate metabolism, and help the brain function.

Hemp seeds contain essential amino acids, which improves muscle control, mental function, and normal body maintenance of cells, muscle, tissues, and organs.

13 Things You Only Understand if You Have a Baby and a Dog

baby and dog1. Having a dog is not the same as having a baby. Remember when your friend told you that she could totally relate to how exhausted you are from dealing with your kid and how you're over dealing with bodily fluids, because she has a dog and is in the same boat? Yeah, you can pick up dog poop with a bag and toss it. Your kid needs constant attention. Your dog sleeps 18 hours a day and isn't cranky if his nap gets interrupted because his whole life is a nap. Your dog doesn't have to come with you to the grocery store, and your dog definitely doesn't beg you to buy him ice cream and throw a tantrum if you don't.
2. Everything goes in everyone's mouths. Dog toys are in the baby's mouth. Dropped pacifiers are in the dog's mouth. Your dog kisses your kid on (and, well, in) her mouth. At first, you're horrified. You yell, "Leave it!" at the dog approximately 3,000 times a day. You sterilize the pacifiers every night and research the best ways to wash stuffed animals. Then, one day when you haven't slept in weeks and your baby giggles when the dog licks her face, you give it all up. You realize it's futile to even try. And you curse yourself for waiting so long because you've never felt as free as you do when you tell your dog to drop the ball, pick it up, and immediately hand it to your kid, who instantly stops crying. Your parents continue to be horrified by all of it though.
dog licking baby
3. Someone has suggested that you get rid of your dog. One of your parents, aunts, uncles, neighbors, or coworkers has told you that it's not safe to have a dog around kids. Dogs are wild animals, someone has explained, and no matter how well-behaved your dog is, anything could happen and you don't want your child to be attacked. You listened to them as they said all of this. You might have even thanked them for their advice. You then ignored everything they said and taught your kid "gentle touch" with your dog. You've learned to ignore all the other garbage parenting advice that people share with you unsolicited, so no need to make an exception here.
4. It's not always cute. Your Instagram feed might be full of adorable pics of your son hugging your dog, feeding him treats, and getting a tongue bath, but what you don't show off to everyone is the meltdown your kid has every time your dog ruins one of his toys or the meltdown you have every time your kid torments your dog by pulling his tail. When your dog barks for no apparent reason and your napping baby — the baby who literally just fell asleep after 45 minutes of fighting you on it — starts to stir, you whisper-yell curse words you've never used before. When your toddler splashes the water in the dog bowl all over the floor, you don't take a selfie while you mop the kitchen for the fourth time that day.
5. You've not proud of it, but you've forgotten to feed or let your dog out at least once. You're a good pet owner. You love your dog. He's a member of the family. But you'll admit there was a time when you passed out on the couch and your dog hadn't gone out since the morning. It happens. So will an accident or two. Or you and your partner look at each other in disbelief as you realize that neither of you gave him his dinner last night. You say you just thought the other one was doing it, but the truth is you didn't think about it at all. You're not a horrible person. Besides, eventually the dog will be your kid's responsibility.
6. Your kid does not help as much as you were hoping. Oh yeah, about that. When they're little, kids get a kick out of holding the dog's leash, handing her treats, and giving her a bath. Then they turn 8 or 9, their grandparents think it's a great idea to get them their own iPads, and getting off the couch to let the dog out will be about as appealing to them as cauliflower. By that age, they figure out that things like vacuuming, putting their toys away, and, yes, taking care of the dog are chores, not games. You ran a good con for a while there, but they're on to you and they're over it. The dog is your job. Again.
baby and dog
7. The process of your dog and baby discovering each other is like dating. It's the weirdest courtship you've ever seen. Your dog ignores your baby. Your baby seems terrified of the dog. Your dog hates when the baby cries. Your baby accidentally pokes your dog in the eye while the dog is trying to lick her. You try to keep them apart because everyone told you not to leave the baby alone with the dog when you're not in the room. But at some point, you catch your dog watching over the baby while she's napping, or your dog starts lying on the floor outside the nursery. And then, one magical day, your dog places her favorite toy in your baby's Rock 'n Play or your kid crawls onto the dog bed, and they roll around together like the best friends they were always meant to be.

8. You're not grossed out by anything. You talk about poop a lot in your house. "When did the baby last poop?" "How many times did the baby poop at daycare?" "Has the dog gone out to poop yet?" "Could you take the dog out to poop because I'm taking care of the baby's poop, and then I'd like to poop and maybe sit in the bathroom alone for an hour and pretend that all of you don't exist?" Vomit comes up a lot too. And reaching into mouths to pull out choking hazards. And throwing out things that have been chewed on. Half the time you don't even know who ruined it; you just know that that toy/lipstick that you just bought is wet, mutilated, and potentially smeared across the floor. When your kid is asleep, your dog is making a mess. When your dog is in the backyard, your kid is getting slimy in the kitchen (How did you get yogurt in your hair?!). You're numb to all of it.
9. Family photos are impossible. You think it's hard to get a kid to sit still and look at a camera? Try adding a dog to the mix. Forget trying to have everyone looking in the same direction and just hope that your dog isn't licking himself on your Christmas card.
10. Babysitters and nannies lie about liking dogs. People who want you to pay them money say things to increase the likelihood that you will pay them said money. Later, you learn that your dog didn't go for a walk or was kept outside all night because your babysitter "discovered" she has allergies. You ask your parents to babysit often.
baby and dog
11. Your dog helps you clean up after (and during) meals. Leftover food that your kid didn't want to try? The dog will eat it. Food that got knocked onto the floor by a toddler or thrown across the table during a sibling food fight? The dog will eat it. High-chair tray smeared with peanut butter? Your dog used to think the random scraps you shared with him were as good as life gets. And you felt saintly for passing them along. Now your dog camps out under the high chair six times a day and is never disappointed. It's like finding a slot machine in Vegas that keeps paying out. Your dog has a hot hand (paw?) and isn't walking away until every single one of those tiny chicken pieces has been licked up off the floor.
12. You have to talk to your kid about death before you ever expected to. When your dog dies, you are devastated. Your kid is sad too, and completely confused. Plenty of people tell you that it's a "teachable moment," and that kids need to learn about death. And that's all true. But it crushes you to see your kid that sad. And you don't know how to handle their grief while processing your own. You all cry. Crying is OK. Because you had a good dog and your kid was lucky.
13. Your kid knows pure love. Parents make kids take baths and eat vegetables and go to bed while it's still sunny out. Dogs are soft and tickle you when they touch you with their wet noses and fetch balls for hours. Your kid loves your dog in a way that you thought only you could. She gets excited to see the dog whenever she walks into the house. She learns to say the dog's name, and then says it over and over again. It fills you with pride when you see your kid talking to your dog, using her new words with her furry friend. You tear up when you see her share her imaginary cupcakes with the dog, or when she scribbles something unrecognizable in crayon and then explains that it's a picture of the dog.
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My Boyfriend Seems Fixated On Sex

My boyfriend swears he's not just in it for sex, but the topic still comes up way too often for my taste. We don't have sex all the time, but he seems rather fixated on it. It's not that I don't like him that way, but how can I redirect the conversation or get him to initiate time outside the bedroom??
Any time a guy's sexual ego is involved, it's tricky, but you shouldn't make a tricky situation even more difficult by dancing around your worry. Some might say you should send a bunch of subtle signals, hint around what's really bothering you, or distract him with sly tricks. But that's only going to make an awkward situation messier. So do something so simple it just might work: Talk to him. Tell him what's bothering you. Ask for what you want.
Tell him you love sex but you'd also like to do more with him. Tell him you love talking about sex but sometimes it's a little too much. And tell him you have a great time in the bedroom but you'd like to have good times with him outside the house too. Tell him, since you're the only one initiating PG-rated plans, it makes you feel like he doesn't value the rest of your relationship and you'd love it if he would plan some activities for you outside the bedroom.
Sex can be hard to talk about, but you shouldn't avoid the issue or approach it like it's a ticking time bomb about to explode if you cut the wrong wire. It's healthy to talk about this stuff and it's OK to disagree. Remember that every disagreement doesn't have to become a fight. And remember that every fight doesn't have to become a crisis.
One last note: If you're going to tell him you want to do things other than sex, you'd better come up with some specific alternatives. If not sex, then what do you want to do? Make some plans and be ready with an answer. Help him understand the kinds of things you'd like him to ask you to do. In fact, during your first serious chat about this, suggest something you two can do immediately so he understands what you mean right away.
I came across this guy online two years ago, and we hit it off. Very recently we met, and since we were attracted to one another, we ended up having sex, where I lost my virginity to him. He even came to my city for a weekend. We chat, Snapchat, sex chat at times too. I'm sure he really likes me but would never date me since he has made it pretty clear that life is short and he wants to die with no regrets. Now my problem here is, I'm OK being in an open relationship. But he is getting whatever he wants while I'm not. Is it wrong to go with the flow and keep indulging in these activities with him? Or shall I take a stand and put an end to this? This is the only kind of relationship I have ever been in. And the romantic part of me believes in fairy tales, looking for someone to sweep me off my feet. But the logic in me asks me to go with the flow. Because in a way, there's nothing wrong being in an open relationship. How should I look at this whole situation?
First, please remember there are different kinds of relationships — and there are even different sorts of open relationships, if that's what you want. A lot of people feel like if they agree to a non-monogamous situation, they can't demand anything else — including common courtesy, romance, or respect. But that's not true. Just because your relationship isn't exclusive doesn't mean it has to be solely physical or meaningless or non-negotiable.
You've had fun, and that's wonderful, but it's only been fun. This guy's focused on playing the field and worries that he would regret dating you seriously. You want more, and you deserve more. That's why you'll regret staying with him much longer.
Whether you're monogamous or not, you can find a guy who cares about more than sex — a guy who truly cares about you and makes you feel good. That's no fairytale fantasy.
Here's why I think you should end this relationship: You say this guy is "getting whatever he wants while I'm not." In this case, that's reason enough. What you want but aren't getting seems clear: You want someone who's crazy about you and invests some real energy in your relationship. That's not, in any way, an unrealistic expectation. It's certainly not too much to ask. There are exactly zero reasons you should settle for someone who's not wild about you.
There's no shame in moving on. Simply tell this guy you enjoyed your time together, but you've realized that you're looking for different things. You don't need to fight; you just need to end this.
As you do go forward, please try to think less about what you can make work and more about what you want. Try to worry less about what you can tolerate and more about what and who makes you feel loved. Please don't settle for someone because you fit into his plan. Keep chasing your own happiness.
Where is the best place to meet good men? I'm a couple semesters away from finally finishing my undergrad degree and work part-time. I'm not interested in college boys (I also tend to be older than them) and I'm one of the youngest people at my job (everyone else is at least 15 years older than me). I tried Tinder but most of the guys on there only want sex and I'm looking for something more substantial than that. In addition, I find that the majority of men I meet even at school and through my job are only interested in casual relationships. I don't want to keep wasting my time with crappy men. Where have all the good men gone?
I hear you — and I understand your frustration. But I hate to break it to you: There's no Good Guy Nightclub where only the nice guys want to dance with you. There's no Good Guy Saloon where only the most respectful gentlemen offer to buy you a drink. And there's no Good Guy Dating Site where only the sweetest men will ask you out. Dating is just as complicated as the rest of the world: a roiling mess of the awful, the mediocre, and the wonderful.
Besides, your idea of a "good man" is going to be different from everyone else's. So my advice is this: Don't just think about where to find a good man. Think about what kind of man would be good for you. And follow your own interests, because they'll probably lead you to him.
If your spirituality is important, go to your church, temple, or vegan drum gathering, and keep an eye out for men who see the world in the same way. If you're into sports or cooking or chess or charity, join a group and see who else shows up. If you like the music scene, hit the clubs. If you're passionate about politics, volunteer for a campaign.
And don't give up on online dating. It's just too popular now to rule out entirely. Think of it like this: If you want a cocktail, you should go to a bar. If you want a car, you should go to an auto dealership. And if you want a date, the most efficient place is to find a date now is an online dating site. Besides, many guys have become so accustomed to straightforward online dating that they've forgotten how to pick up signals IRL.
These days, it's less about deciding whether to date online than it is figuring out how to use these apps and sites wisely for yourself. (Since you're bound to meet some awful dudes and some good guys wherever you go, part of online dating is learning to move on from the totally random bad dates before you waste too much time.) Tinder is, by definition, the most superficial app, since it's all about photos. So maybe you should try a site like Bumble or Hinge (which will introduce you to friends of friends) or a relatively old-school site like Match or OkCupid or eHarmony, where you can use the substance of your profile (and not just your profile photo) to draw in a match who's interested in more than your looks. I wish there were an easy answer, but remember the old line:Anything in life worth having is worth working for. A good guy is worth waiting for too.

5 Sweet and Sultry Sex Positions for Your First Time



For many people, first-time sex is kinda ... meh. Awkward fumbling + potential free-floating anxiety + unbidden thoughts like, OMG! I am having sex right now! = a lower-than-usual chance of actually having an orgasm the first time out. Sorry. #Truth.
However, you can still make it hot, romantic, and fun by:
  • Finding a private, safe spot.
  • Making sure you're relaxed and entirely sure you want to go through with it.
  • Taking the time to let yourself get fully aroused. (If someone wants to bone you and doesn't want to wait and help make this happen, lock the gates, sister.)
  • Lubing the fuck up. (Even better, squeeze some lube onto his fingers and have him rub it on for you.)
  • Having him wear a condom — obv.
  • Relax even more. Something weird will happen. There may be a queef, a fart, or your bodies might make weird slappy noises when you're doin' it. He may slip out or might be pressing his dick diligently in non-quite-the-right spot. Just laugh and start kissing again, and you'll be just fine. Stick to basic positions that are comfortable and easy, like:
  • 1SIDEWAYS SWOON

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                                               LOVIN' SPOONFUL
First time sex is all about connecting in an incredibly intimate way with someone. If you want to really go deep in that direction, try a side by side position. You can gaze into each other's eyes, touch souls and whatnot, plus the angle isn't known for deep penetration, lowering your chances of receiving a mechanical jackhammer pounding. (Note to men re: the jackhammering—No. Just no.)

Simple: He gets in outer spoon position, puts one leg over your body and enters you from behind. In a good relationship, inner spoondom is a great place for feeling like you're safe and all is right with the world. Take advantage of all that cuddliness to make your first time feel all warm and lovey.You are feel to enjoy all the good-feelings of the bonding hormone oxytocin hitting your brain, plus if you'd like, you have a free hand for rubbing yourself at the same time.
      

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THE LAP WALTZ

Woman-on-top positions are great for first timers because you get to control how deeply you want to go. Have him sit on a couch (um, maybe put down a towel or something), then kneel over him. One of you can hold onto his penis to guide it as you lower yourself onto him. It's ok to go as slowly as you want—just makes it hotter. Once aboard, put your hands on his shoulders and use your legs to push yourself up and down so that you're riding his penis. Once you get the hang of it, you can gyrate, grind against him or stop for a moment for a long kiss.

4TOPPING FROM THE BOTTOM MISSIONARY
It's a classic for a reason. For more control, instead of going straight into legs-wide-open Missionary, assume the usual position, but curl up your legs in front of you (like a fetus, but, you know, a sexy one.) Your respective body parts will still get where they need to get, but if you need to slow him down, you guide him as you please with your legs.

5THE FRISKY DOGGY



If losing your V-card is a little overwhelming, what with all the eye gazing and wondering how the hell you're supposed to be touching him, etc... go with doggie. All you have to do is get on all fours and experience the feeling of another person inside of you for the first time. If anything feels like it's too much, just move forward a little bit until you want more. Press your legs together it you want/need shallow penetration and open wider for deeper penetration. Rock your hips a little or don't—it's up to you, girlie.