3 major lessons to learn after a break up

1. You're stronger than you think

Often times, those who love the hardest usually

get hurt the most. They get devastated when a

relationship comes to a close, even if they were

the ones who pull the plug. Losing the one you

love has a way of making you feel like you'll

never be whole again. But it can also be one of

the most freeing experiences of your life if you

allow it to be. Instead of sleeping in self-pity,

take time to get to know yourself again. Search

for ways to enjoy being alone and your

confidence, strength and resilience will return. If

it was never present, then you've got some work

to do, and a relationship should not have been

your primary focus to begin with.

2. Don't focus who is to be blamed

When a relationship ends, one of the first things

we do is attempt to figure out what went wrong

or who to blame. While it is good to reflect on

the cause of the split, dwelling in the place of

blame is detrimental to your growth. It breeds

resentment and keeps you in the habitat of

stagnation. The best lesson one can learn is that

of acceptance. Also take fault in the break up,

and accept that your former mate might not.

How they choose to deal with the relationship

ending is none of your business but focusing

more on improvements and perhaps forgiveness

for next time will lighten your load of pain and

hate.

3. Loving Again is Ultimately a Choice YOU

have to make

After a major split, it becomes your choice to

decide if love will be in your life. Nobody can

prevent you from having and making that choice

no matter what they've done. If you choose to

build a wall and be heartless, that's on you.

Simply realize that you can be held captive by

what others have done to you. The pain of

heartbreak should linger only for a short while

but the length of time you let it stay within you

is totally a personal choice.